I'm straight but not narrow.

This sticker is for all those people who have come to some conclusions about their own sexuality -- and maybe some conclusions about other people's sexuality. 

I interpret this sticker to mean that the person who displays this sticker is not gay -- or at least, they don't want you to think they are gay, even if they are. Meanwhile, they want you to think they are OK with other people who are gay -- even if they aren't. 

If you buy this rather cynical point of view, the person with this sticker could actually be gay, and maybe even narrow-minded. I know that is a little hard to imagine, but the world is full of strange people -- and some of them are not very honest, even with themselves.  

That's why we will only sell this sticker to honest people. If you try to buy this sticker and you are actually gay, or narrow-minded, your computer will explode. OK, so don't even try it. 

By the way, we know there are TONS of straight people out there who won't buy this sticker because they want people to think they are gay. After all, there  are so many  special perks and benefits that come with the gay territory, like housing discrimination, employment discrimination, estrangement from family, lack of benefits for partners, harassment,  and many others. 

The truth is that most so-called gay people are really straight, but they want special treatment. And most so-called straight people are really gay, but they don't want you to know. 

If you really want to confuse the hell out of people, put this sticker on upside-down, or just a little crooked. 

And always remember the words of Richard Nixon: "I am not a crook!" I'm glad we got that straightened out! 

Dan R. Frazier